Dating / Love / Online dating / Romance

Something Different

It’s strange to be saying this, but I think I may have found the next man I could have a fighting chance with. I just haven’t technically met him yet, since he lives over 500 miles away.

Enter Graham. He’s not everything I have ever wanted in a man. He’s more.

I got my first message from him about 2 weeks ago, and I wasn’t really all that attracted to the pictures he had on his profile.  But his initial message was so genuine that I couldn’t help but wonder about him.

“You have a lot of great energy! Love your profile. First time my vasectomy showed up as asset – funny!  It’s late and I’m waiting for luggage in the airport coming back from a conference in San Diego. Two more days and I get to go home. Your profile caught my eye because you’re very attractive, but the reason I hit the “like” button is because when the written profile matches the smile in your photos, then I think the fun and happiness are authentic. That’s rare and I’m attracted to what appears to be effortless joy. My name is Graham. Nice to meet you.”

I replied with a fairly bland ‘thank you’ and gave him my name in return. He wrote back and asked if I would be up for getting to know one another, and I said ‘yes.’

Graham is not really my typical businessman type, but possibly something even more special. He works with men who abuse women, both emotionally and physically. He identifies patterns and shows them ways to reform. Honestly, what could be sexier to a woman than a guy who helps men treat women better? He’s really kind of a superhero in some ways.

Physically, he pretty much fits what I normally go for. He’s a 50-ish divorced father of two, with a strapping athletic body, sparkling green eyes and a full head of auburn hair mixed with some gray at the temples. His wide cheekbones, square jaw and full lips complete the picture of perfection. Not to mention his smooth baritone voice which very nearly sends shivers up and down my arm.

He’s definitely a bit more outdoorsy then I would have imagined I would be into, but I find myself feeling that there is something comforting about it. Something about the woodsman aspect of him somehow illuminates his “solidness” all the more. And when I scrolled through some of his Facebook photos to see  him standing on a snowy bank in the beautiful Minnesota timber, sporting a three-day beard and wearing a rugged pair of manly lace-up boots, it literally made my heart stop beating. Stick a fork in me, I’m done, I thought somewhat muddled as I quickly closed the web browser to escape my feelings.

Things have been progressing quite naturally between us since our initial message exchange a couple of weeks ago. He has walked the ever so strategic line of showing interest and giving me plenty of space.  One thing I’ve really been enjoying about him is his ability to ask deep questions without seeming probing. He has a wonderful way of creating a safe place for me to open up without fear or repercussions. He seems to be very solid and stable, and his interest in me appears genuine and multi-faceted.

I’ve had the pleasure of conversing with him on the phone at length, and he kindly shared some video promos on which he is addressing the public. I can’t lie, as I watched him speak, my attraction towards him skyrocketed. Something about seeing such a bright man talking in such a genuine manner about the variety of subjects abused women face knocked me off my square. I watched his lips move, taking note of how strong his hands were as he used them throughout his monologue, when suddenly I wanted him to know me. Like really *know* me. It was a fleeting but thrilling moment. It was at that instant I decided I want to let him in a little more and experience all that is Lola. He has shown himself to be more than worthy.

Am I ready to open myself up to the possibility of love again?  I guess we’ll see. Graham is knocking at the door of my heart, and showing himself to be a very worthy choice.



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