Relationships exhaust me.
I’ve read the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, by John Gray which I did not think was all that earth-shattering, (I really hate relationship books, because they make people think that’s how all relationships are/should be) but one thing I did find interesting was his rubber band theory.
The rubber band theory by John Gray states that men have an intimacy cycle that is comparable with a rubber band, stretching when he pulls away, and springing back when he wants to get closer.
Now I’m sure this is not true of all men, but it’s clearly true of some women, because this is me.
During my brief relationship with Pierce a couple of years ago, he told me that he felt like I pushed him away and then turned around and pulled him close in no time at all. Roberto has also noted this pattern over the years. They are 100% correct. This is how I roll.You would think them being men from the same planet and all, that they would get this. But no.
Now it’s Liam who is confused.
As I wrote in my last post, “A Funny Fish”, I didn’t want Liam to spend the night the other night, even after a wonderful date and our first sexual encounter.I just knew that I needed to think about it before I made that leap, so pulling away was the most natural thing to do.
And as is my usual pattern when I really like a guy, I thought about it for a couple of days to see if it was something I really wanted. I determined that it is something I THINK I can handle, and now I’m ready to take the next step. So last night I extended the invitation to him to spend the night. His response was to tell me that he’s confused. His exact words were: “Thank you, but I’m confused. You didn’t want me to stay the other night, and now you do?”
I really do not want to lose this guy, so I told him straight up that sometimes all I need is to simply pull away and think for a minute and then I’m good to go.
I’m certainly finding that I am not a woman for the faint of heart. I just hope Liam can hang in there. He’s been a real champ thus far. Of course we also have to hope that I won’t have a complete meltdown and suddenly bail.
So many factors, so little energy.